Can't Squish This Pest...

While we're on the subject of prehistoric activity, scientists have just discovered a fossilized claw in a German quarry that's believed to be part of an ancient sea scorpion. It's eight feet long, making it a smidge taller than Michael Jordan and no shorter than most compact cars. The research article also calls it the "largest anthropod ever to have evolved."

The 390-million-year-old rock may help paleontologists redefine just how humongous primitive creatures were during an epoch when warding off attackers was commonplace. Their size evolution was doubly crucial considering their once easy prey, fish, had grown a hard armored shell. Plus, they ballooned in length alongside other equally intimidating spiders, insects and crab - all of which were jockeying for control of their animal kingdom.

From the Associated Press:

"We have known for some time that the fossil record yields monster millipedes, super-sized scorpions, colossal cockroaches, and jumbo dragonflies. But we never realized until now just how big some of these ancient creepy-crawlies were," University of Bristol paleontologist Simon Braddy said. Braddy and Markus Poschmann both discovered the claw in Germany.

Of course, they were the preeminent species at one point, facing no natural enemies until a slow extinction from the very prey they once sought - fish. With jaws. Yep, that's a tough break in the Paleozoic Era. Still, you can't deny they were the kingliest of carnivorous predators in their heyday. Heck, they even cannibalized themselves because the meat was available and they needed a fresh meal comparable to their body weight.

From an NPR article:

"They kind of looked like a flattened submarine," Yale paleontologist Eric Tetlie said. "Then they had these massive claws in front which could be up to a meter long."

Unlike their common descendants, NPR says, this gigantic sea scorpion - called an "eurypterid" - munched their prey whole without injecting a poisonous dose from their stinger. But these monstrosities disappeared 225 million years ago - when said prey devoured them. However, other scientists believe the scorpion die-off was a result of oxygen deficiency in the oceans.

Whatever the cause, you best believe that an eight-foot gargantuan is lumpy potatoes next to it's other, more ravenous contemporaries. And no, I'm not talking about the fish. I'm talking about dinosaurs like the ichthyosaurs.

There's an NPR radio news report on the subject on their website. Select "Listen Now" after clicking here.

Images Courtesy NPR.org, Associated Press

Leroy Jenkems, Butt Hash, Waste, Runners, Fruit From Crack Pipe, etc.

In a word, Jenkem. The newest underground street drug sensation that's hitting the teenage nation. That's because an officer in Collier County in Naples, Fla. just issued a bulletin that several high school students are tripping out on a euphoric high. This shouldn't cause too much surprise, of course... unless you notice the drug's ingredients are human excrement and urine (pictured above).

Yes, apparently the primary ingredient, among other equally disturbing putridity, is "raw sewage." Word of the drug caught parent's attention, says the bulletin, "through several conversations with students at Palmetto Ridge High."

The drug is harvested inside a makeshift container until the bubbling waste ferments as a gas inside a latex balloon attached to the bottle's mouth, according to a Washington Post column. Once the balloon has completely filled, the gas is inhaled until the, ahem, Jenkem-user scores a hallucinogenic high. And the gas in question? Why, it's methane- the gas compound produced after breaking wind. (Geez, I've heard of fart-sniffers, but this is ridiculous.)

In South Bend, Ind., St. Joseph Regional Medical Center ER physician Dr. Tom Sweeny says that other than the "sense of euphoria and a heightened sense of awareness," immediate symptoms "are lower blood pressure, a decreased heart rate and lowering respiratory drive." Hallucinogen users - including the ones that huff Jenkem, are even liable to stop breathing altogether, according to the WSBT article.

Even the Drug Enforcement Administration has a difficult time categorizing its narcotic status. Adds Drug Enforcement Administration spokesman Garrison Courtney in a FOX News story:

"We wouldn't classify it as a drug so much because it's feces and urine. You've pretty much hit the bottom of the barrel if you're experimenting with this."

However, although Jenkem use has African origins - children in impoverished third-world countries like Zambia used it to achieve a cheap high - not a single case has actually been documented in the United States. In fact, even the Collier County bulletin turns out to be an elaborate hoax - the two pictures above were snapped by an Internet user aliased "Pickwick". His or her concoction? Merely "flour, beer, water and Nutella," says an article from an Australian NBC TV affiliate. To wit, no human waste.

Meanwhile, the ever-reliable rumor-debunker Web site Snopes.com has classified the status of Jenkem as "False," citing the lack of documented American cases. Which isn't to say it doesn't exist at all - from a 1999 BBC News Brief on Snopes:

"At the Lusaka sewage ponds, two teenage boys plunge their hands into the dark brown sludge, gathering up fistfuls and stuffing it into small plastic bottles ... They are manufacturing "Jenkem", a disgusting, noxious mixture made from fermented sewage. It is cheap, potent and very popular among the thousands of street-children in Lusaka. When they cannot afford glue or are too scared to steal petrol, these youngsters turn to Jenkem as a way of getting high."

See, the news circulating around Collier County of a new hallucinogenic was enough to scare local law enforcement into issuing a bulletin, which caused a stink around the 'net throughout October.Yet Jenkem does exist abroad, just not here - yet.

Still, could you just imagine what Robocop would say in an anti-drug PSA if Jenkem were to ever hit American streets?



You tell 'em, Murphy.

Images Courtesy Washington Post, WSBT.com

Move over, Dinosaur-Asteroid Theory. Hellooooo, Volcanoes!

Until recently, many thought the dinosaur-death-by-asteroid theory 65 million years ago was a whodunit Sherlock Holmes could've solved in his sleep. But this case ain't so elementary, my dear Watson.

Recently, Princeton University paleontologist Gerta Keller argued at a Geological Society of America meeting on Oct. 31 that many rapid-fire volcanic eruptions carbon-dated back to around the time of the mass extinction could've spilled enough greenhouse gases to trigger a "runaway global warming" aggressive enough to wipe out the dinosaurs, according to a Time Magazine article. Sulfur and carbon dioxide could've sprayed from volcanoes in the Deccan Traps (a 580,000 sq. mi. area in central India) into the atmosphere, showering not just unbreathable air but acid rainfall. In short, if the asteroids didn't cause the dinosaur's abrupt demise, the volcanoes sure did.

However, there's been heated debates over which occurred first, according to a National Geographic article; for Keller, the answer was obvious. After following a meandering lava flow through the Gulf of Bengal, which empties into the ocean roughly 600 miles southeast of Deccan, Keller spotted prehistoric plankton called foraminifera. The plankton, she alleges, died off about 300,000 years before the mass extinction, then reemerged later in smaller quantities. Then, Keller says, the asteroid destroyed them for good. It proves that massive volcanism hit critical mass several millenia before the infamous impact offed the dinos. From MSNBC:

"It's the first time we can directly link the main phase of the Deccan Traps to the mass extinction," said Keller.

Original research for the Asteroid Theory dates back 30 years after physicist Luis Alvarez and his geologist son Walter discovered a vast crater at Chicxulub on the coast of Mexico. Then, a global iridium layer was found in 1980; it's an element common in asteroids but not on Earth, according to an MSNBC article. Keller's not refuting the lone asteroid theory, but she is saying the space rock might've had an accomplice - a deadly cocktail of intoxicating atmosphere and magma spurting everywhere. Again, from MSNBC:

"The dinosaurs might have faced an unfortunate coincidence of a one-two punch - of Deccan volcanism and then a hit from space," she explained. "We just show the Deccan eruptions might have had a significant impact - no pun intended."

Not surprisingly, the notion of a second contributor to the mass extinction was likely to draw heavy skepticism. And unbelievers there are. University of Hawaii geochemist Greg Ravizza thinks Keller neglects to point out that these lava flows under scrutiny were only until recently tied to the Deccan Traps. The jury's still out on whether they're interrelated, according to a National Geographic article. Yet skeptics won't deny that massive eruptions are like to produce a super-toxic atmosphere.

If Keller's "double whammy" theory can be authenticated, it means a massive rewriting of, well, all Earth Science textbooks. 'Course, it doesn't take a Princeton researcher to deduce that a colossal asteroid wouldn't flush all living planetary life down the drain (for the record, it didn't - the fish survived). That's why a so-called "second gunman" is a argument much easier to digest.

Images Courtesy Time.com, MSNBC.com and NYTimes.com

Why they picket

Prefer to hear the rationale behind the writer's strike straight from the horse's mouth?

Writers of the World, Unite!

Some TV-philes aren't sitting pretty. They're in withdrawl: their arms and hands shivering, their knees knocking, and their teeth chattering. They're not cold, but suffering from a lack of daily perennial wisdom by late-night kingpins Jay Leno, Conan O' Brian and David Letterman.

Their "fix" won't arrive anytime soon. That's because on Monday, the massive Writer's Guild of America traded their pens for picket signs for the first national Writer's Strike since 1988. Y'know, the one that cost Hollywood $500 million in lost revenue? The reasons are simple: as a Minneapolis Star-Tribune article puts it, "online video is still in its infancy, but its moneymaking potential is salivating."

Today, roughly 75 percent of Internet users watch an average of three hours of Web video each month, according to Pew American Life & Internet Project, a non-profit initiative that produces Internet statistical reports. That translates to a cash cow of media exposure from which all 12,000-plus writers won't receive a cut.

So far, the current arrangement for residuals between the Guild and the Alliance of Motion Picture and Television Producers is $0.036 on the dollar per DVD unit sold and absolute zip for new media (i.e. online and digital sales, exposure to Internet television programming). That figure was accepted in 1985. The Guild is demanding a sharp increase (from about 0.5 to 2.5 percent of sales) in royalties from DVDs and Web productions, cell phones and other gadgets.

Yet curiously enough, that Star-Tribune comment earlier is precisely AMPTP's agrument as well. Film and television studios contend that it's too early to agree to a binding formula regarding profit margins for Web content.

On their website, AMPTP President Nick Coulter says, "when we asked if [the Writer's Guild] would “stop the clock” for the purpose of delaying the strike to allow negotiations to continue, they refused ... It is unfortunate that they choose to take this irresponsible action."

Here's a handy fact box from the CNN Web site:

• How you'll be affected- Immediately: Late-night talk shows, which depend on topical material, will go to reruns
• In about one month: Daytime soap operas will go to reruns
• By January-February: Current prime-time shows will likely run out of fresh episodes - Reality shows unaffected; Fox, with fewer hours to program and powerhouse "American Idol" returning in January, in best shape if strike continues, according to The Hollywood Reporter
• ABC has stockpiled several new shows, could put them on in midseason if strike persists
• TV networks have stockpiled TV movies
• Movie studios in decent shape for now

Here's the thing: the 1988 strike lasted 22 weeks, according to The Washington Post. That's plenty of time to melt through all those stored hours of unwatched programming on your TiVo. This stretch could arguably allow watchers to ween themselves off serialized and scripted dramas and learn to embrace online entertainment or reality shows. This alternative isn't comparatively better by any means, but a gloves-off writer showdown leaves us clinging to the sidelines.

It ain't all bad, though. Writers are still trying to keep us entertained during the hiatus:

Images courtesy CNN.com, washingtonpost.com

U.S.: Slowpoke of the Internet

The fatboy on the high school track team. The escargot of the information superhighway. You'd expect this to happen to a third-world country, but statistics compiled by the Organization for Economic Co-operation and Development (OECD) say America is sandwiched in between nations with cheaper broadband connections. And yes, you read that graph (right) correctly: Iceland and Luembourg carry more households with high-speed per 100 than we, the patriarchs of the Web.

Prospects look so bleak, in fact, that our Web woes have attracted the intervention of the Federal Government. So, the House Energy and Commerce Committee passed legislation Tuesday to start annually cataloguing every internet service provider in the country, including subscriber data and advertised bandwidth speeds.

Not only should the data draw a sharper picture of how the U.S. measures up, but bill-proponent Rep. Ed Markey, D-Mass., wants to target regions lagging behind on high-speed access.

But there's actually more salient reasons for this type of corroboration. The OECD neglects to factor in individuals who have broadband access at work or in their college dorms, says think tanks who favor total Internet deregulation (as opposed to government-controlled bandwidth).

Larry Cohen, The Communication Workers of America (CWA) president, wants to erect a policy now so broadband is guaranteed for everyone.

"Unfortunately, we don't know the full extent of our problem because our data is so poor. We don't know where high- speed networks are deployed, how many households and small businesses connect to the Internet, at what speed, and how much they pay. Without this information, we can't craft good policy solutions. So we continue to fall farther behind," he said.

Nevertheless, the statistic puts U.S. broadband at an unceremonious 15th place in 2006, down from 4th in 2001. And our current slog through cyberspace isn't close to diminishing, either. We're slouches in comparison to South Korea, whose government-regulated ISPs rent Digital Subscriber Lines (DSL) to consumers on the cheap. It's evidently working, since broadband connections rate 15 times faster than the average American user. Those Korean's got Seoul, baby!

Other examples pointing to U.S. sluggishness include Paris, whose "triple play" package (Web, TV, phone) costs half as much as our equivalent. Canada has 65 percent of households surfing at blazing speeds, much higher than America's 55. And lest we forget, Japanese users routinely connect with broadband as high as 100 megabits per second.

This renewed interest in widespread net-neutrality arrives about six years too soon. Democratizing the Internet shares its weight of pros and cons, but essentially it means no one company (AT&T, Verizon, etc) can have a stranglehold on how much bandwith is trickled down to the consumer.

Put another way, America finally has the chance to catch up. Yes, even to Iceland and Luxembourg.

Here's a spiffy explainer on the concept of net-neutrality:



Images Courtesy Associated Press, CNN.COM

To sleep, perchance to dream

Before you chance breezing through the pages from that gargantuan Chem textbook at 5 a.m., bleary-eyed and blistering for shut-eye, look around. Is there a pink unicorn preening itself at the foot of your bed? If so, you might be suffering from a psychological disorder triggered by (what else?) sleep deprivation.

Today, the Scientific American Journal says that UC Berkley and Harvard University med schools just uncovered a link between lack of sleep and overemotional behavior, a trend which could easily lead to psychiatric problems like paranoia, ADHD and post-traumatic stress disorder if left unnoticed.

Science researchers stuffed 14 sleep-impaired test subjects into a room, and each handed photographs of an increasingly disturbing nature. Harmless images of empty wicker baskets evolved into more sinister snapshots of tarantulas crawling on human shoulders and burn victims. Meanwhile, every subject's amygdala, or part of the midbrain responsible for interpreting emotion, was monitored to detect differences in awareness while exposed to awkward stimuli.

Long story short, the sleep-deprived amygdala secretes more adrenaline to jump-start brain activity, inducing a sort of heightened arousal that causes everything from elation to outrage in seconds flat. Adds a San Fransisco Chronicle article, that's because the medial prefrontal cortex, which controls logical reasoning, grinds nearly to a halt, making it harder for the brain to distinguish fact from fiction.

The brain goes haywire, the SA article further explains:

"Medial prefrontal cortex is the policeman of the emotional brain," [Berkeley psychologist Matthew] Walker says. "It makes us more rational. That top-down, inhibitory connection is severed in the condition of sleep deprivation. … The amygdala seems to be able to run amok." People in this state seem to experience a pendulum of emotions, going from upset and annoyed to giddy in moments, he says.

So, still itching to crack open that Chem textbook? Better wait 'til morning. Unsurprisingly, sleep deprivation is also associated with obesity, daily stress, depression and even heart attacks, says the Center for Disease Control. Yes, losing those 40 winks contributes to slower metabolic rates, increased irritability throughout the day and higher blood pressure - all improving one's chances of cardiovascular disease, according to a Reuters article.

This notoriously affects college students the most, considering they require at least nine hours of sleep average (as opposed to seven for adults).

Think of it this way: Given the dozen or so illnesses associated with sleep deprivation, hallucinating a pink unicorn should be the least of your worries. You're likelier to irritably snipe at friends and peers the next day and give yourself a coronary. In short, lay off the all-nighters, folks.

Images courtesy Reuters, Scientific American